Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

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I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Why did McLaren hope that the Ferrari pair would pit twice during the Italian Grand Prix?

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Why do you think most harem anime and manga have lame male protagonists that would be considered losers and pathetic by most people?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Even Captain James T. Kirk was trapped in a woman's body. Don't you think he'd support trans people?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t cotton to rapists

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I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

The doctor said 'be happy.' Music therapy can help cancer patients do that - NPR

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

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I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

How does a 45-year-old man get a girlfriend?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why do I get spun and then want big fat cocks to suck?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

How do I develop the patience to read books?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I see through liars

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Kuorans can you write a sad story about kpop?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I am 13 and I am planning to run away. What should I do to succeed?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have complete contempt for fakery

How do empaths destroy narcissists?

I have a reading level above third grade

I can count

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I can read

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light